He Gave Us His All

While praying over the Last Supper, it dawned on me that this was one of the most beautiful scenes in the life of Jesus - the moment when Jesus, amidst his turmoil of emotions due to frustrations over hypocritical structures, anger and hurt over fickleness and betrayals, and also sadness over the little limited time He had left, still stayed very focused on his mission to impart his Father's love to us. This He did during the Last Supper by giving us the gift of his very self in the form of the bread and the wine which He clearly said was his very body and blood. Bread blessed, broken and then shared. Wine blessed and then shared. Nothing less than He himself that was soon to be broken was being shared. His own very flesh and blood given!

It was more than enough that He had already reached out to so many people, including the most unwanted or shunned, performed miracles and told parable after parable about his Father's generous and forgiving love, assured us that He was the Good Shepherd who knew and loved every one of his sheep, that like the woman who continued to search unceasingly for her lost coin, He would always be here for us. His teachings were well documented and would stay a source of rich inspiration for generations to come. 

But no, even in his last, most difficult moments on earth, He still very deliberately gave us this precious gift of his whole self as manifested in the Eucharist - His very self that would endure so much suffering and even death out of love for us. In giving us the gift of the Eucharist, He gave us His all - forever!

Two thousand years since that memorable Last Supper, the Eucharist as well as the Blessed Sacrament, which we know as his True Presence, continues to affect us deeply. Sitting and praying before the Blessed Sacrament, or receiving Him into our own body and soul at mass, we are drawn closer each time to His loving and lifegiving heart. How amazing that this continues to this day! How fortunate for us that He chose to give us His all! 

My dearest Lord,

In the Eucharist

You gave us everything

Each and every and all of you.

Teach me now to do the same

To give you the whole of me

The each and every and all of me

To genuinely imitate the way 

You gave us Your all

Amen.

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Finding God on the Roll

Last week, we celebrated our daughter's birthday in a rather unique and creative way, by going to Enchanted Kingdom. We plotted our series of rides, intentionally leaving the roller coaster for the climax. Our children had no second thoughts about it - they were going to ride! The roller coaster was precisely the reason why we chose to go to this place. 

I found myself wanting to do the same, but also very scared. Just looking at the coaster from afar was enough to tense up my whole system. Three times the coaster would be totally upside down! This was really a challenge for one who easily gets dizzy from an octopus ride, or that sinking feeling on a ferris wheel on its way down. There was a part of me though, that really wanted to do it. Perhaps this was a midlife urge - to break away from old fears and to move forward with a new way of living more daringly and courageously.  

Then it was time!  My hands grew cold, my heart felt tight. Until I decided to resort to the one sure way I knew would bring inner strength and peace - the act of surrender, of entrusting the whole of my being to Him. So when we were finally seated (at the very front row, for that is what these most daring kids of ours wanted!) and strapped securely in place, I decided to close my eyes and pray, "Lord, envelope me with your presence and be with me all the way so that I can survive and even enjoy this ride!"

Then the roller coaster began to move, swinging backward, lunging forward, curling up and circling 360 degrees, then with growing momentum, again lunging forward and then circling 360 degrees for the second time, then upon dropping down, quickly circling 360 degrees for the third time, and so on and so forth. Everything happened so fast, and people were screaming. I remained very quiet thoughout, while my eyes saw only darkness. I did feel some push and pull movement, the cool wind, and the security of the two straps, which all throughout I imagined to be Jesus arms holding me securely in place!)  Then in a short while, the whole ride was over. (What! So soon?!) 

We made it, hooray!! But my real joy was internal. I felt that this roller coaster ride was a real encounter with the Lord. A very special moment of feeling securely wrapped with His presence, a moment when fear was relegated to the back while the choice to just place myself in His hands and surrender my fears to Him enabled me to experience inner peace and courage. 

Who could have imagined that a roller coaster ride would turn into a graced encounter, a memorable spiritual experience!

Finding God on the roll... 

I'd gladly do it again, but next time, perhaps with eyes wide open!


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